'Be anxious for nothing..." ~Philippians 4:6

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

REDEMPTION written 8/6/2009

I accepted the offer, and set out to accumulate as much as I could. I thought it was a good idea. For years I went from one place to another and saw them multiplying. I had them. I explored my options with them, but I left them to their own devices and only checked in from time to time. They were still there. I wanted to use them, but I wasn't decisive. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with them, but was confident they wouldn't go anywhere. I even offered them to someone else if they should need them. They didn't, but appreciated the offer. Maybe it looked like I forgot about them, or didn't appreciate them. I got reminders that made me feel secure that I could use them whenever I pleased. I thought they were mine. You can do whatever you want with what's yours, can't you?

I supposedly forfeited what I earned because I didn't use them according to the plan. The day after I decided I would use them, I found out they were gone. There was a plan? Just because I didn't read the fine print, what was on the lines, and in between, didn't erase the fact that there were conditions I needed to follow. I was laboring under the misapprehension that I was in control of their use.

My first reaction was "Fine. Whatever. I don't care". I decided they were clearly never mine in the first place, and the whole thing was a scam; a scheme to draw me in to an endless relationship--and I detest scheming and game playing. Games that involve bats, balls, nets and the like are fine. Games that involve vital organs? Games designed to make me feel bad? Not so much. So I figured, "That's that. They're gone. You lost them. Get over it. Move on. You can get more from somewhere else". I was still bothered though. I thought I did all the right things. I thought I did my part, and to lose so much, all at one time, just didn't seem fair.

Every day, though, I get a new message or two which seems a little cruel. "Redeem what's yours!" WHAT? I was already resigned to the fact that they were gone! The first time I read 'forfeit" was all I needed. As far as I was concerned, the deal was done. I blew it. I played. I lost. So there. But every day, what I lost is being dangled in front of my face. 'Let us show you how to get them back!" Why can't I just be left alone? The real owners took them back; now why won't they just keep them and stop bothering me! Apparently there is a way to get them back and, once again, the clock is ticking. If I don't take advantage of the offer, they will be lost forever. It seems, they're not gone after all. I can only liken it to them being held hostage. They're somewhere waiting for me to redeem them, but it's not going to be as easy as it once was. I waited too long. I left them alone. Time passed and it seemed I wasn't interested. I didn't use them in the time allotted, but that didn't mean I was never going to, did it? Were they a gift? Obviously not. I suppose the premise was, "You can earn these- as many as you want, but you have to use them within a certain period of time, or we're taking them back". I should have known. They wrote it down. I had the rules. I just neglected to read them. I assumed they were my property. Apparently not. When I remembered I had them, and sought to use them, they were gone.
As it stands, it's going to cost me to get back what is mine. It's more than I want to pay, but I've decided that they're worth it and I want to redeem them. I'm being given options, but each option costs more than the last. The simplest, quickest way to redeem them is the most expensive, and will hurt. I have to decide. Do I want them?

Now Lord, I'M talking about my frequent flier miles. What are YOU talking about? See, Lord? There You go. I was not talking to You, but I should know by now that You're always listening. I wasn't even talking out loud, but you know me--my thoughts and every beat of my heart, and apparently every word I type. How did this become about You and me? Okay, fine. I yield. Show me if and where I'm slowing down, slacking off, being forgetful, and neglectful. Show me if and how I'm procrastinating and being indecisive. Show me if I'm failing to pay attention to details. Show me when to move and when to be still. Show me when I'm feeling faint and heading toward giving up. Show me what you've given me that you want me to use immediately. Don't let me die on the vine. Thank you for your mercy and grace. Thank you for making provision. Thank You for being so nos...I mean involved. (smile) Thank You for Your Word which is life to me, and the best reminder. I can't earn what you've given, but I sure can use it all to Your glory. I'm fully aware that you're patient, but I'm not going to press my luck....Thank you for redemption.
Now. About US Air...

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