Loneliness, alienation, jealousy, insecurity, ignorance, and the need to control, or be the center of attention, will motivate some to pit the people in their lives against each other.
Ask yourself who is at odds with you, and why. If it's not because of anything either of you have done, there's probably someone with a big mouth, and an even bigger agenda, who's been feeding the both of you. It may sadden and surprise you when you find out who it is.
If you're going to have enemies, at least let it be your idea.
Some people tend to immediately act on what they've been told by those who they believe are credible, sane, and honest. They act without exercising discernment. They thoughtlessly take on the fights of others as if they were their own. They waste a lot of good shade that could be thrown where it belongs. There's an alliance they want to keep. Doing so means abandoning the ability to think for themselves. There is a fear of disagreement. A dissenting opinion may sever the relationship. When there is some payoff, many people will fiercely defend what they know is neither right, nor fair.
Many act on what they want to believe about those they don't even know. They become appalled by what they hear from a single, trusted source, and abandon the issues in their own lives that require--no-- DEMAND all of their attention. They become indignant; angry, and go barrelling into the lives and affairs of others. They've got a piece of their minds to give, that they will soon wish they'd kept for themselves.
Armed with what they are sure is the truth, they boldly confront others. Without any real authorization, they've been empowered to correct, mediate, interrogate, manage, reprimand, fix, and save the day. They think they have a right to do so.
They are in for such a rude awakening.
People do what you allow. When you invite strife-loving people into your life; when you lie, gossip, and sow seeds of discord, you amass a small army founded on error. That army takes its marching orders from YOU, and when you demonize others, that army doesn't even think. They follow your lead. They defend you. They mistreat others on your behalf. What they don't bank on, is you not being the bastion of integrity they imagined. They don't really want to hear that the tales you tell, and ideas you espouse have no basis in truth.
The potential to wreck your personal and professional relationships is tremendous when you lie--especially when the people who know the truth are still breathing...and capable of speaking...and have proof of your aversion to peace and harmony.
You can't be shocked and bewildered when the trouble you started (because you couldn't or wouldn't keep your mouth shut) finds its way back to your doorstep, and the people you thought were your allies begin to distance themselves.
It is wise to obtain all angles of an issue before forming an opinion, taking a side, or charging in with your two cents. It's not always necessary to do or say something about what you hear. You can really get your feelings hurt, damage your own reputation, and tarnish your credibility by hopping onto the wrong bandwagon for all the wrong reasons.
Liking and loving people doesn't mean you will always agree. Failing to speak truth to power--or even your family, friends, neighbors, etc., can backfire.
Think for yourself, search your own heart for error, and make sure your motives are pure.
Where, and to what and to whom you pledge your allegiance, matters.
Stand on the side of right--even of no one else joins you.
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