FRIDAY THOUGHTS: DON'T BITE OR BARK: PRESIDENTIAL EMOTION

"Like a city whose walls are broken down, is a man who lacks self-control". 
Proverbs 25:28

Ever since he took office, people have been itching to see the rough side of President Barack Obama, that they hope is smoldering beneath his caramel skin. 

The so-called “oil spill” (By the way, "spill" is what I did with my tea yesterday, and quickly soaked up with a half a sheet of Bounty), is prompting many to question whether his idea of "furious" is the same "Furious" that has close cousins named "Bonkers", "Postal" "Ballistic" and "Wiling Out".

 
Does he yell? 

Does he scream? 

Does he curse or throw things? 

Is he violent? 

Is it possible that a human being can be so admirably calm and collected? 

Where's the emotion? 

What amuses me, is that the questions are being posed by other human beings.

I am personally glad that The President has been a good example of dignity and grace, under fire--especially when he is constantly blamed for things he neither initiated, perpetuated or supported. 

I admire his public cool! 

People do have a way of pushing buttons. 

The President, has been consistent-- clearly thinking before he speaks, and recognizing his limitations. 

It seems as if he got the message my Mom always gave: 

"Know when to turn it on, and when to turn it off". 

I don't know what he does when the cameras are unplugged, and frankly, it's none of my business. What I have seen, however, is the kind of man who instills pride and admiration. 

Unfortunately, that's not always good enough for his Black or White brothers and sisters of America. 

(I wonder how other races feel about being excluded from these conversations, or if they're more than happy to be left out).

I thought about our President's "damned if you do; damned if you don't" dilemma, on a recent trip to Guadeloupe. 

I was served by a very polite young man, who was working in the hotel restaurant to subsidize his continuing education. 

One of my traveling companions asked him if he spoke English, and we learned that he was fluent in English-- as well as three other languages. 

He recognized that we were from America, and told us of the person who suggested he learn Ebonics, in order to engage African- American tourists. 

I will never forget the anguish on his face, when he asked if I thought it was a good idea. 

I'm glad I was able to keep my cool. 

I pray that I convinced him of the utter stupidity and insulting, downright evil nature of the suggestion. 

Sadly, we are still playing the "sounding white", "acting white", and "wanna be white" cards. 

Sadly, we still consider a well-mannered, well-groomed, well-spoken Black man as some kind of alien, who needs to take a crash course in "Keepin' it real" --taught by a pre-school drop-out named "ManMan".

Ecclesiastes 1:9 comes to mind. 

"The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the Sun..."

People were, are, and always will be jealous, ignorant, hateful, discouraging, prejudiced, and antagonistic. 

People will always expect more from others than they expect of themselves. 

People will always try to tear others down, and rejoice when reputations, and public personas are tarnished. 

I get the feeling that many people would be less offended by our President, if he weren't quite so intelligent. It's also too bad that his very appearance--also the result of conditions out of his control--gives some people indigestion. 

He is who he is. 

He has done well. 

He is not perfect. 

He is not a god. 

He is, however an impressive man, who doesn't have to feed anyone's sick need to perpetuate negative stereotypes about the behavior of Black men. 

We don't need a poll to know that there are embarrassing crazies in every community, who make us cringe. The President need not abandon his dignity to feed into foolishness.

I'm glad that my three young nephews honestly don't understand what the big deal is about a Black President. I'm glad they see President Obama in office as the rule, and not the exception. 

I feel sorry for those who, when they visualize a Black man, prefer to see an irresponsible, selfish, shiftless, inarticulate, loud-mouthed, violent, drunken, drug-dealing, sperm-spreading, foul-mouthed buffoon, who looks like he shops regularly at Pimps-R-Us.

It's sad that some things always boil down to race. News flash: America has a President who happens to be a Black man. Unfortunately, the hope for him to launch into an Ebonics-laden rap, while dressed in sagging pants, munching on chicken wings and watermelon, during a limo ride to a Tyler Perry play, is still alive. 

"When is he going to show his true side?", many wonder. 

He can't have fed himself so completely on the elusive, self-control fruit. When is he going to become Super Negro?

If I could talk to him, I would tell him, "Resist the encouragement to act like a clown--unless you're on stage and getting paid---or work at a circus on the weekends." 

Heck. I would tell that to anyone. 

What is the benefit of seeing someone behaving badly?

I spent a lot of time as a teacher stopping fights, and warning little kids that all some people want is a ring side seat to their humiliation. 

Notice who's encouraging you to argue, curse or fight. 

Notice who is calling you a chicken. 

Notice how they're practically salivating to see you throw a punch, or make a fool of yourself. 

Their petty lives, and ignorant outlooks, and misinformed narratives depend upon having yet one more negative thing to talk and laugh about-- at your expense. 

There's so much buzz about "emotion". 

So much for that. 

How many times have we seen intense "emotion" being shown in light of a tragic incident, only to find out later that the "emotional" one is the murderer?

Everyone has emotions. 

Everyone can choose to what degree those emotions will be displayed. 

Sometimes we waste far too many tears, and even more words. 

If screaming and raising a ruckus would stop that oil from gushing, we'd all be occupying a spot on a beach in the Gulf of Mexico right now.

If you're one of those people who is constantly chided about the level of emotion you do, or don't display, don't abandon your personality to put on a show for someone who is probably less stable than you are. 

Yes. You are a human being. 

Yes, there will be times when your blood will seem to boil. 

Yes, you will want to see if you can effectively string together a few non-Sunday school words. 

Exercise self control anyway. 

Imagine God as the only one sitting in the audience watching you.

When you are calm and exercise self control, don't be surprised by those who pick and pick just to see if you will haul off and slap the daylights out of them. Don't bite or bark just so someone can feel good in confirming the negative opinion they already hold about you.

"...But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet." 

~1 Thessalonians 5:8