FRIDAY THOUGHTS : PRESERVE YOUR PEACE

It's not unusual for people---specifically older people--to miss the thing that used to define them, or give them purpose. It’s not unusual for them to talk about their past accomplishments, or feel nostalgic. There’s a difference, however, between missing a thing, and mourning it. Reminiscing is one thing. Needing to exhume a thing, is another.

No longer being in charge, can be unsettling for some people. The loss of responsibility or authority, can leave them, perhaps, feeling useless, idle, restless, envious, slighted, regretful, or forgotten. Instead of enjoying their newfound freedom, and extra time, or adopting just, positive causes, productive hobbies, or legitimate business, they just get BUSY. 

It’s sad to watch, as once rational, even-tempered people become meddling busybodies and rabblerousers, who equate their current state as "being put out to pasture".  The yearning for something to replace the rush of their former job, title, position, or activity becomes toxic.  They seem to need affirmation, so they convince themselves that others are woefully incompetent, or need their input. They believe that if they’re not doing the job, it can’t be done right, well, or at all. 

In their zeal, they become a thorn in the sides of those currently holding the positions that they mourn. They actually view the chaos they stir, as a public service.

It’s not unusual for them to start counter groups, committees, clubs, or cliques. They enlist gullible or opportunistic people among them, to be their allies and minions. They need, of course, to be heard, feared, admired, respected, or obeyed. They see themselves above, or exempt from the rules that govern everyone else. In their mission to regain relevance, they relentlessly look for even the tiniest fault, and manufacture crises. 

They recklessly start fires. 

They breed strife. 

They spread rumors. 

They become litigious.

They can’t conceive of helping, or being subordinate. They need to tell others what to do, and commit others to their self-serving tasks.

They need something to control or fix, even if it means deliberately breaking stuff. 

They’ll instigate the fall of a thing, just to be able to say they picked it up.

The danger, is in them expecting others to mourn their loss of power, too, in ways that are neither constructive, productive, nor righteous. 

Fail to go along with them, and you may find you’ve been made an enemy, a target, or the subject of their criticism, gossip, or slander.

So what do you do? You DO know that they’re looking for your endorsement of, and participation in their nonsense, right? 

Nevertheless, stay out of the fray, scroll by the social media rants, decline the frantic calls, and annoying group texts, and skip the back door meetings.

Know the motivation behind, legality, legitimacy, and the integrity of anything you’re asked (or hounded) to support, co-sign, or rally behind. 

Note who’s the ringleader, causing unnecessary commotion in harmonious places. 

Don’t be intimidated by who people think they are, say they're related to, or boast that they know.

Mind those who would rather burn the whole house down—while you’re in it— just to have their way.

Be discerning, use your time, energy, and resources wisely. 

Know what’s fact, and what’s foolishness. Don’t be timid about asking questions about anything concerning you.

Don’t just blindly react to everything you see, hear, or read, no matter who’s behind it. Think for yourself. 

Don’t just hop on any bandwagon. The person pulling it, may be insecure, self-centered, feeling entitled, in need of a fight, and unaware of how destructive their actions are to everyone around them, as they long for lost purpose. 

Pay attention, and acknowledge what you see. Sometimes, sowing seeds of discord tries to masquerade itself as concern, caring, or  activism, but it can’t. It’s bitter mess.

Don’t let people cause you to pick up crosses that aren’t yours, or mistreat people with whom they have issues. Discern when a thing is personal, and stay out of it. If you must engage, RIGHT is the only side on which to be.

Beware of those who only care about having authority, being seen, or considered important—but are oblivious to the problems, worry, and anxiety they impose.

Many have less time, on this side of their age, than ever before. If they’re blessed to still be able-bodied, and have a reasonable portion of sanity left, hopefully, they realize that there have got to be better, healthier, more sober ways to spend one’s so-called “golden years”, than being embroiled in constant fights, backbiting, frivolous busyness, pointless arguments, and childish, wasteful, unproductive, blood pressure-raising pursuits.

Preserve your peace. A fire can't exist, or be sustained without fuel. Reserve yours.