I heard my late Vision sister, Joanna’s voice, and got tickled. “You, too, baby. You, too”.
It can be embarrassing and uncomfortable when you realize that you’re neither special, nor exempt, and stuff isn’t just applicable to OTHERS.
There you are, in the room, with the crowd, wearing the gear, shouting the slogans, thinking you’re one of the “good ones”, and you find out how you’re REALLY considered. You’re not IN. You’re a means to an end. You can take a joke, until you realize you’re the butt of it. You can appreciate satire, until it’s gaslighting.
Some people crave proximity to others so much, that they make themselves comfortable in spaces and places where they aren’t liked, welcomed, nor wanted. They don’t think the disparaging words, so brazenly uttered, are about THEM, too.
Whether it’s opportunism, denial, negative self-worth, or self-hate, people will twist themselves into pretzels defending, applauding, and making excuses for people, policies, and organizations that clearly don’t respect, represent, nor reflect them.
I thought about the rousing, and very entertaining song/debate from the musical “West Side Story”. Anita and the ladies were boldly singing and dancing in defense of America. Bernardo and the guys were singing sarcastically in opposition to America, and in homesick praise of Puerto Rico. Back and forth they went, arguing the virtues or failures of their homeland.
Anita, unfortunately, had to confront her unwavering support of her adopted homeland, as she was bullied, taunted, assaulted, and almost raped in the candy store. America showed the America-loving Anita, just how insignificant and hated she was. Fortunately, Doc showed up.
The lyrics that Anita and the ladies sang in 1961, are being used, in 2024, to justify the supposedly comedic bashing of Puerto Rico.
Not only does representation matter, it matters what aspects one represents. If people can get you to adopt their impression of you, and demean yourself, or your own, they’ll dig up and use the very persona and words they gave you—in or out of context—and throw them in your face. “See? YOU said it! You did it? Why can’t I?”
They will use your own words and actions as a license to ridicule and abuse you.
Today, people are forgetting—Anita sang those lyrics that she didn’t write, not RITA. Rita struggled with low self worth, and reluctantly took on stereotypical, ethnic roles to make a living, and build a career. Rita actually WAS raped. Again, representation matters, but it also matters what you agree to present, once given an opportunity. It may be construed—not as a fictional role—but as common, truth, facts, accurate, or reality. How you present, may be used against you, and cast as the norm for everyone who looks like you.
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