'Be anxious for nothing..." ~Philippians 4:6

Monday, November 18, 2019

MONDAY THOUGHTS: STARTING OVER


When you have a habit of saying “God takes care of me”, should you ever be surprised when He does just that? 
I’m grateful today; marveling at how my prayers were answered.
It’s been a healing year.

I remember when I unpacked my paint and brushes. I’d almost forgotten how lost I could get in the act of painting. 
I’d used the small canvas as a palette for the last piece I painted, as a farewell to my family home. 
I looked at the small canvas with the build up of acrylic, and decided not to toss it, but give it an image of its own— something that conveyed the peace, freedom, and gratitude I felt; 
something that spoke to the importance of appreciating the simple things, and the necessity of stopping to see the beauty all around me.

#arthelps
#artheals

MONDAY THOUGHTS: THE iNTERVIEW

I watched the interview. 
Or, was it a set up

All I know, is that a third voice chimed in, and wouldn’t shut up. 
It was reading between the lines, noticing body language, and reminding myself that the American experience has really done a number on Black people— and we, depending on when, where, by whom, and how we were raised, have in turn, done a number on each other

The survival speech is alive and well, and so is unrelated, fictive kinship.

“Know when to turn it on and when to turn it off”. “Don’t make waves”. 
"Do what you’re told". 
"Stand up straight". 
"Say “yes sir” and “no sir".
 
“When one of us gets “in” we have to “act right”, and kiss up to the resident veteran puppets, and follow their lead, so we don’t mess it up for everyone else. The resident, veteran puppets, who LOOK like you, will blackball you first
IF you get “in” you can’t have an opinion, and you can’t say “no”.  You should be in a perpetual state of gratitude— not to God, but to “them”.

The ones who are “in”, are not as secure as we think they are; they can’t speak as freely, nor socialize as freely, either
They take a chance, if it’s revealed that they still deal with those who’ve decided NOT to play the game.
They say one thing privately, and another publicly. They’re constantly afraid of losing it all, so they’ve got to keep hustling. Never mind how it impacts their friends or family. Money matters, most. 

A pedestal has been erected for them, and they eagerly climbed up, without checking its integrity. Perched on what they perceive to be the top of the world, they cover their insecurity with a veneer of arrogance. They're convinced that they’re exceptional, untouchable, and safe. They’ve always been discouraged from having real power, and they dream of having their own
They looked down, and got a bit brave and cocky; started ostracizing and mistreating people; throwing people under buses.
They have to be everywhere; in everything; working all the time, because they never know when it will all come to an end.
All that hustle and grind can come to a grinding halt at any time, if they step out of line, but they’ve convinced themselves they’re the gatekeepers; they’re indispensable. 
They’re “in”. 
Integrity means nothing. Truth either
Just keep quiet and play along, and you might be able to play for a long time. 
Don’t just sing, but dance, AND pick the cotton. 
Just don’t get too close to real power. 
That's how they get to stay “in”, and keep all of their toys.”


NOTHING is worth the loss of your integrity, and surely not your soul. 
Be honest about what you do. 
People who truly care about you, would neither expect, nor demand that you compromise your integrity, devalue yourself, or work yourself to death for them. 
Ask them. 
They’d rather have you; they’d rather have quality AND quantity time with you

For me, that was the take away. 

MONDAY THOUGHTS: THE SOUND OF SILENCE


I hear the new phase for ignoring someone, is “ghosting”.
 
I laughed the first time I heard it, and considered that there are times when “going ghost” is not only best, but a healthy, wise move. 

When you know the spirit that someone brings, it’s smart to protect yourself. 
What you can’t control, however, is the commentary of those who aren’t happy with your refusal to further tolerate their behavior.

It’s funny how infuriated people get when you decide you’ve had enough of their abuse, inconsideration, disrespect or negativity. 
It is telling when someone always, easily, or immediately thinks the worst of others— particularly those who have always been nothing but supportive, amenable, and kind to them. 
Those thoughts aren’t new. They’ve been nurtured; incubated, and always lingering just below the surface of a personal or working relationship.

They’ve been waiting to say, “I told you so.”

What IS this practice of badmouthing good people when they refuse to be compliant? 
What is this habit of throwing people under buses, and being mad at the people one has harmed? 
Why is it the FIRST resort, to smear the reputation of someone because they aren’t making you, or your agenda THEIR priority? 
Could it be because of a penchant for being:
ill-tempered, 
self-obsessed, 
opportunistic, 
demanding, 
impatient, 
bossy, 
critical, 
insecure, 
competitive, 
suspicious, 
possessive, 
catty, 
arrogant, and/or overbearing, that YOU are no longer tolerable, and are eroding the good you DO have to offer?

Living inside one’s own head, without considering facts, extenuating circumstances, respect for the rights of others, or grace, strips a person of the notion that others CAN be genuinely loyal.

Never hastily respond to others out of your own narrative or assumptions. 
Snarkiness  or anger are never endearing. 
If you persist in being unbearable, don’t expect to receive anything except shade, silence, or even pity in return. 
It is entirely possible that the conclusions you jumped to about the actions (or inaction) of others, was done so prematurely, ignorantly, and tainted with your OWN modes of operation or patterns of thinking. 

Drama-loving, nasty, manipulative, and entitlement bearing individuals are rarely, willingly invited or entertained by those to whom harmony and peace are not only mandatory, but not negotiable. 

An individual’s history of displaying a bad attitude, even in pleasant circumstances, creating division, and keeping up confusion, eventually becomes intolerant to even the nicest, most gracious, long suffering  people.
 
An inability to get along with others causes a person to ever anticipate when the proverbial shoe will drop. Continue projecting one’s own issues onto others, and it WILL drop.

#Godaintmeantforpeopletoownpeople 
#whenpeopleshowyouwhotheyarebelievethem
#preserveyourpeace 
#boundariesmatter

IN THE ABSENCE OF LEADERSHIP

In the absence of leadership, you can see whether a team is truly committed, not only to the organization and the leader’s vision, but to fostering an environment where teamwork thrives. 

When the leader is away, you'll find out:
1. who will stay on task, and who wastes time

2. who isolates themselves, and who engages fellow team members.

3. who has aspirations to be the leader, themselves, and who demonstrates leadership qualities without even trying.

4. who is consulted for accurate information, advice, or help, and who is ignored.

5. who’s competent, self-motivated, and genuine, and who’s opportunistic, needs supervision, mines others for information, and is prone to making mistakes.

6. who works for the good of all, and who sabotages progress

7. who talks a good game, and who produces results

8. who’s conscientious, and who’s careless or overzealous

9. who goes the extra mile, and who works to the rule

10. who’s on a career path, and who just needs a job

11. who has good ideas, and who takes credit for the ideas of others

12. who respects the leader, and who resents, or is in competition with him or her

#whenthecatsaway



MONDAY THOUGHTS" BECAUSE YOU WANT TO

Today, I just finished a set of paintings of someone I really admired, for someone who is nothing if not consistent, delightful, and brutally honest. 
I realized that, these days, if I’m doing something, interacting with someone, agreeing to it, going somewhere, or saying “Yes”, it’s because I want to. 
I suppose I’m on a peace-preservation, find-the-Joy, no drama mission. 
It’s awesome.

You could half-step, work to the rule, be mediocre, or half-hearted, but when it comes to the things you realize you’re doing because you want to, your whole self is energized. 

Things you want to do, inspire and challenge you in positive ways. 
You find yourself in “heartily as unto the Lord” mode. 
You get it done, happily, knowing you’ve done your best— and in record time.

#whatsnext
#artmatters
#arthelps 

Monday, August 26, 2019

MONDAY THOUGHTS: KNOW YOUR STRENGTHS


I thought, as I watched the praise dancer’s jerky, bizarre gyrations, “You can’t TELL her she isn’t Judith Jamison.” 

The words “fit” and “conniption” came to mind, too. 
I think she expected applause. 
She certainly was using everything in her flailing arsenal— including an Elaine Benes/Cliff Huxtable-esque dance move. 

Was THIS the “crazy praise” the Bible foretold, or just more of the foolishness that bombards our phone and computer screens?

Everyone watching seemed perplexed, horrified, and amused. Why was the spectacle even allowed? 
Had the bride and groom been ambushed? 
Was the “dancer” a relative? 
Was it a thoughtless joke? 
Had the couple lost a bet? 
Was an actual dancer in attendance, who would have brought the dignity the ceremony deserved? 

What goes undone or horribly awry, when we don’t allow wisdom to prevail, and abandon what we’re actually GOOD at, in favor of what someone else does?

People are deciding they have particular skills, insisting that those skills be visited upon others, and wondering why few are applauding.

Sometimes the frustration from the tepid responses (or laughter) is a result of coveting the skill of others, and deluding oneself into thinking one actually possesses equal, or greater skill—and a RIGHT to demonstrate it. 

“I can do that, too!” may be a positive affirmation, but is it true only in your own mind? 
Why not be honest? 
Why not confess, 
“I want to do that. I WISH I could do that, but only if I can do that WELL.” 

Platforms are everywhere. 
You can even pay to play— which is what many resort to when desired doors don’t, or won’t allow access. 
Someone will always put you on, but is it to promote what you do well, take your money, or ridicule what you do poorly—and then profit from your humiliation? 

Every day, social media gives us all a good laugh at the expense of those whose sheer nerve and delusion are eclipsing their better judgment. 
Even church services are sources of comedic, and embarrassing entertainment these days. 
So many organizations fail to assess their readiness, or monitor the quality of their own output. They employ irresponsible camera persons, and we get to see as one person after another butchers a song, mangles a sermon, or loses their footing as they’re hamming it up for the cameras. 

Yes. Art is subjective, but I digress...

It’s okay to defer to those who actually know what they’re doing. 
Don’t be so blinded by the shine you think someone else is getting (for what they can actually do), that you foray into lanes in which you cannot effectively maneuver. 

Sometimes we don’t want to admit it, but better DOES exist. It’s a shame to dismiss it in favor of mediocrity that makes a mockery of what’s sacred, brings judgment (and sanity) into question, and encourages MORE mediocrity. 

Don’t minimize or ignore your own strengths by chasing the strengths of others. 
Acknowledge the time, energy, effort, skill, and even anointing, that is the foundation of the good, the relevant, and the excellent. 
Exercise that muscle that allows you to find and encourage the good outside of yourself. 
Applaud and celebrate all things well done, and don’t lie about mediocrity— even your own. 

The heart, I’ve read, is desperately wicked. “From the heart” might not be the great and humble defense that one thinks it is. Perhaps that heart, full of envy, jealousy, and covetousness, is the primary producer of the ridiculousness and mediocrity we now experience, allow, and endure, in places where it doesn’t have to exist.

Sunday, August 25, 2019

SUNDAY THOUGHTS: POETRY PROMPT—Lessons Learned


LESSONS 

Drama-filled, can’t abide Drama-free
Busy, can’t stand Content
Nosy is livid because you care less
What you said, is what you meant

Trouble, is troubled that you don’t fret
Worry, wants you to weep
Inconsiderate, expects you to pick up every cross
So you, too, can lose focus and sleep.

Controlling, goes ape when you hold your own reins
Needy, hates your other friends
Bossy thinks its way should always be yours
Messy, prays conflicts don’t end

Competitive, can’t safely run its own race
For looking to see where you are
Bully shows up to intimidate
Critic, will deduct a star

Insecure, expects you to shrink and play dumb
Relegates you to one lane
Envy throws enough shade to block out the Sun
Hate, hopes you’ll never shine again.

The joy is, Discernment exposes them all
Lets you see all that you need to see
So that you can maneuver the ditches and darts
And sail safely to victory.




VRWc2019