It's amazing how your response to offense, greatly offends those who feel they have a right to inflict it.
"She has a problem"
"Something's wrong with her"
"She's out of control"
"She's immature"
She's weak'', and
"She needs help" are all the condescending reactions to women who have had enough, and dare to fight back--not with fists, but with carefully chosen words.
Body language and facial expressions speak volumes.
Practically every woman who watched the debate has been in Senator Harris' shoes. She was not exclusively impacted by the snake-like delivery, complete with whispered lies, blatant hypocrisy, and constant deflecting, deployed by her opponent. It's more common than many think.
She, however, peeped his hold card early, with one after another expression that reminded me of a Bernie Mac stand-up routine. "Naaaaawwww, North Carolina! Errrybody in here know what that look means!"
She knew what, and who she was dealing with. She'd already sized him up. It's that steely, Judge Judy-type leer; that allergic reaction to lies and the liars who tell them, that doesn't "give a rat's behind" how emotional you think she is.
People who are steeped in their lies--committed to, and consumed by them--whether willingly or by force, develop a certain demeanor. I'm convinced it's a spirit. They think it's invincibility, but it comes across as fear, and leaves them looking buffoonish. That lying spirit is quite comfortable and cavalier until faced with a discerning individual.
The worse thing a devil can realize, is that you see him or her, and you refuse to retreat, second guess yourself, be tricked, silenced, or intimidated.
Fathers of daughters, I hope you, in particular, were paying attention to the debate.
You've seen that kind of man before.
He's a supervisor, co-worker, neighbor, a teacher, pastor, and even a friend of yours.
He's a man who is conflicted; he cowers before, and kisses the ass of any arrogant man who reveals and mocks his weakness and insecurity, but he has no problem at all attacking a woman.
Teach your daughters that it is a good thing to be discerning, wise, and intelligent; that it is safe and prudent to speak up when necessary, and still be a lady.
Teach them that there is nothing bitchy, evil, or monstrous about calling out disrespect and glaring lack of integrity.
Teach them to identify a lying scoundrel when they see one.
Teach them to spot when they're being manipulated.
A daughter must have allies in her parents, not co-conspirators who align themselves with those who endeavor to break her spirit.
The day that you defend, support, joke with, glorify, or excuse a misogynist or sexist in her presence, you have lost her confidence and trust.
A certain spokesperson, (known famously for lying professionally, and daily for years), is currently dealing with the embarrassment of being called out publicly by her own fed-up teen-aged daughter.
She aligned herself with a fool, and as a result, forfeited the respect of her daughter-- and invited a virus into her home.
Be careful what you support.
Don't allow anyone to enter your home--either through the front door or the television--and contradict and bulldoze the moral lessons you've taught, and rules you've established.
Don't allow anyone to demean, ridicule, overrule, dismiss, or disrespect your daughters.
Check yourself, your philosophies, motives, thoughts, beliefs, and habits. If YOU have a knack being condescending, chauvinistic, dismissive, and dishonest, understand that your daughter is taking copious notes. Check yourself.
The lesson you're teaching by what you endorse has consequences. You won't be able to explain, and your daughters will not understand.
Remember Lot. His daughters have been catching hell for centuries, but it was their father who was responsible for protecting them and establishing the parameters of the relationship.
He failed them in favor of his own interests, greed, and ambition. Note how he so brazenly pimped them out.
I can only imagine how mortified they, and their mother were.
It's no doubt that they heard their father offer them to the violent strangers who showed up at their door. Is it any wonder that they concluded later, that incest was an option worth exploring?
His wife has been catching hell, too, for looking back. She's been labeled disobedient and faithless for centuries, but can you blame her for not wanting to take one more step to go anyplace else with her grifter of a husband?
Children learn what they LIVE. What they see resonates much more than what they hear. It explains why so many women willfully, and enthusiastically support a man who has clearly shown total disregard not only for them, but for the women in his own family.
He embodies what they saw in their own fathers, grandfathers, uncles and brothers. That abuse is familiar. They have a warped idea of what strength is, ignore the rhetoric that subjugates them, and stupidly vote against their own interests.
I can only imagine the level of dysfunction going on behind the closed doors of many homes. How many women are afraid, brainwashed, confused, abused, subservient, and silenced?
How many are forced to, or feel they have no choice but to applaud what disgusts them?
How many feel stuck and without options, particularly during this pandemic?
All over the country, however, blinders are coming off, denial is lifting, and vigilant fact checkers are countering the gaslighting and lies.
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