MONDAY THOUGHTS: MOTHERS AND DAUGHTERS

The irony is that Mothers' Day was only a week ago. 

I watched as the young lady was lured into a corner of the room by the older lady. At first, I didn't think anything of it. I thought, perhaps the old lady may have wanted to give the young lady a gift, or well wishes before she left the gathering. 

The young lady is kind and conscientious; talented, smart, and pleasant. 

The old lady is progressively proving to be messy, petty, and insecure. 

She was doing a poor job of whispering, but a great job of sowing seeds of discord. 

The young lady said nothing, but it was clear that she was uncomfortable, yet trying to be respectful. 

The older lady's "advice" was motivated by her extreme disappointment over her own daughter's recent decision to relocate thousands of miles away from her. 

With a sly smile, she counseled the young lady to, among other things, limit the amount of time she spent with, and talked to her mother. 

I could hear her. 

All I could think of was Eve talking to the serpent in the Garden. 

I stood up. 
Why would a woman who has a daughter of her own, try to drive a wedge between another woman and her daughter? 

Fortunately, the young lady's mother walked in, discerned what was going on based on her own history with the old lady, and whisked her perplexed daughter away.

 

The old lady didn't quite know what to do with herself. She stood there in the corner, wringing her hands, and not seeming to know which direction to look. 

Her scheme failed. 

She just stood there, defeated. 

The young lady and her mother had a frank discussion about what happened. Their closeness and trust in each other easily cancelled out what the older lady had tried to do. 

Any respect the young lady had for the old lady, vanished in an instant, but because of her kind heart it was replaced by pity.

Some people are truly evil. You don't want to believe it, but it's unfortunately true.

My hope is that the old woman would examine herself, recognize how greedily and regularly she feeds on strife; see how it has poisoned her tone, infected her conversation, skewed her thinking, and marred her demeanor, posture, countenance, and relationships. 

She has become positively toxic--almost unbearable to be around. 

She wasn't always that way. I wonder what happened. 

I hope that, one day, she figures out the root of her frustration, insecurity, and hatred, and stops justifying her conniving, imposing ways. 

She flippantly commented that she recognizes that she's "different" and has stopped caring about what people think of her. 

She was right about one thing. She has stopped caring. 

She has forgotten how to treat others. She bulldozes through life wanting love and respect, but receiving indifference. 

What she is, sadly, is deceived. 

Her icy, curt, snippy speech does little more than repel others (including her daughter) and force them to keep their guards firmly up, and locked. 

Maybe seeing the young lady interacting with her mother, smiling, laughing, and happy was too much. 

How tragic it is, that she continues to talk and act her way into never experiencing what they have.

CHICAGO'S FINEST IN THE DMV

I knew where I would be this morning. I figured if I left at 10 or so, I'd get to the mall in time for the grand opening. I LOVE popcorn. I have every since I was a child. My uncle, one of Plaquemine , Louisiana's oldest residents, used to make the most delicious popcorn balls. He would make roasting pans full of popcorn. Sometimes he'd use sugar; other times he'd use pure cane syrup made by the Steen family in Abbeville. I didn't think anything could come close to his recipe. In my life, I've eaten a lot of popcorn. I like Detroit popcorn. State Street popcorn sold at Cracker Barrel is good too, but Garrett's is by far the best popcorn on Earth. I knew it could be shipped in those wonderful, signature tins, but for years I've hoped that someone would open a store in the Washington Metropolitan Area. I believe that the best of the nation should always be readily available in the nation's capital. Today, delighted customers in the DMV welcomed the 50th Garrett's store and the finest popcorn Illinois has to offer.
My niece was sweet enough to go with me to Fashion Center at Pentagon City. We went via Lyft, and entered the mall where lots of construction was taking place. We looked at the mall map, but didn't see Garrett's. We figured the best way to find the new store was to look for a very long line. When we looked down into the food court, it was clear where Garrett's was. We went down the escalator and happily joined the line. It was like joining a band of believers. Everyone was on one accord.
Shoppers walking through the food court stared at the long line, and then asked, "What is it? Are they giving something away? How long have you all been standing here? Either it's free, or it's just that good." The atmosphere was so lovely! Everyone's smiles and patience drew people. They wanted to know what we knew. Many of them joined the line-- that was the length of the food court-- based solely on the recommendations of those who waited. People from Chicago seemed happiest. They'd known for a long time what the rest of us found out about by virtue of flights in and out of O'hare. There was no pushing or shoving; no line jumpers, just hundreds of very happy people united by their love of popcorn. Strangers held conversations and swapped stories. 
It was a lovely morning--and the popcorn was worth the wait.

TUESDAY THOUGHTS: POETRY PROMPT----JEWEL

Out of the ashes of long-wasted years

Out of the salt mines of leftover tears

Out of the battle with doubts, and old fears

Came a jewel

A jewel

Shine in the light that no one can destroy

No need to hide

Go on, lift up your eyes

Shine and reveal your unspeakable joy

You’re a jewel

A jewel

Light of the world; salt of the earth

Think of the miracle that was your birth

God has great plans for you

So much for your hands to do

You’re a jewel

A jewel

Grace under pressure, now just look at you!

No scars, or signs of the trials you’ve been through

Strong and resilient

And sparkling like new

You’re a jewel

A jewel

God says you’re above; you’re never beneath

Fearfully made; oh, so loved

Don’t you see?

I’ll keep on singing it ‘til you believe

You’re a jewel

A jewel!

Shine!

Shake off the dust, and see the glory

Shine!

Be bold, be brave, and share your story

Shine!

Encourage them; encourage me

You’re a jewel

A jewel.




vrw c2016 

TUESDAY THOUGHTS: ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT

Some people come baked with drama, and always have. 

It makes you keep your guard up, because you know something will jump off at any minute. 

It's hard to be comfortable around nosy, provocative, pushy people who don't respect boundaries. Being in close quarters with them isn't exactly something to which you look forward, but you suck it up. 

Your childhood narrative says "Be nice, gracious, and polite", but it's hard. 

You want to say something, but nothing that comes to mind would pass the "ladylike" test.

I could feel my stomach tighten. 

My first thought was to make myself scarce. 

Not dealing at all--totally ignoring things and people is always an option. 

Save yourself! 

Just don't engage! 

History dictates that there will be fires to put out. History doesn't have to repeat itself, though. 

It only does, when we don't change our responses to the actions and words of others. 

Allow people to annoy, intimidate, and bully you, and they will. 

Our responses don't ever have to involve stressing ourselves by accepting, as normal, the disturbance of our peace.

We really do give our power away, too much and too often, to people who only seem important, menacing, or antagonistic. 

If we'd stick around long enough, we'd see that they act from places of weakness, immaturity, jealousy, or insecurity. 

Take your power back today. They expect you to run and shrink and hide, because that's what you've always done. 

The day that you look them, or it, in the face and speak up, you'll be amazed how dynamics change. 

Don't be surprised if you laugh out loud. 

You're a lot stronger than you think, and you always have a choice. 

Everything does not have to affect you. 

Shake it off.
 
Your problems, issues, and annoyances are valid and shouldn't be trivialized, but there will always be something that arrests you AND your thoughts and feelings. When you find out what's on the plate of someone else, suddenly, your plate looks like a gourmet meal. The revelation of the gravity of the problems in the lives of others, has the power to stop you in your tracks. 

There you were, on your way to feeling anxious, disgusted, exhausted, overwhelmed, becoming fearful, losing hope, making hasty decisions, and making snow-capped mountains out of molehills. Then you stop, turn around, and immediately reevaluate just how serious your stuff really is. 

You may have initially perceived it to be a pain in the neck, but that was before you had a virtual decapitation to which you could compare it. 

It may have seemed inconvenient, but you realize, you've got lots of time, and whatever it is will be gone before you know it. You get grateful in a hurry.

You felt tears; your heart was racing a bit; you did say, "Oh, hell no!", but all of that changes in a matter of seconds when you become aware of what you're not dealing with, and what is plaguing others. You tell yourself: "I've got this. I thought it was something, but this is nothing. Compared to what's going on with them, this is a piece of cake." 
Your attitude adjusts quickly. 

Your power is back where it belongs. 

Your eyes open a bit wider. 

You rethink your responses.

You learn from, and are empowered by the lives of others. Their circumstances sure have a way of altering how you perceive yours. That big deal really isn't as big as you thought. 

Yeah. It's still there, but it's manageable--extremely manageable--with one hand.

MONDAY THOUGHTS: MOTHERS' DAY

I thought about how Pastor Sturdivant doted on his mom at church yesterday. 

"She's moving! Somebody ought to be taking pictures!" 

Just the fact that she was walking, was a big deal to him. Her presence was everything to him. It was inspiring.

 

That tiny lady had saved his life. 

She's his hero. 

You couldn't help but feel the love and admiration--and wish your own mom was there, too. 

Faith United showed love, and gave roses and a gift to every woman present, but it was clear that Mrs. Sturdivant was beloved, not just to her family, but the entire congregation.

It was lovely to greet her. When she took my hand, I searched her face. Her complexion, salt and pepper hair, glasses, and sweet smile reminded me of Mommy. 

I imagined that my Mom would have been very much like her, a bit fragile, but exuding strength, wisdom and grace; elegantly and neatly dressed, gracious, and smiling; enjoying the way everyone looked out for her; seeing no need for the fuss everyone was making, but humbled by it and appreciative of it just the same. 

Mothers' Day was easier this year. There was no heaviness, except for thoughts of friends and loved ones who, for the first time, made no calls, no visits, bought no cards or gifts, and made no reservations. They’d made no plans, except to purchase flowers to lay on a fresh grave. 

For them, my heart was sad.

I still miss my Mom, but yesterday was different. 

I can't explain it. Maybe I'm different. Maybe that resilient, determined part of my Mom is finally standing up in me.

My daughter made my weekend special. Any time spent with her, makes me smile.  

From the beautiful luncheon at the Ritz with the Women of Zion Church, to her family's cookout (just sitting in the yard among the beautiful flowers her cousin Pam so lovingly attends to, was so peaceful), to her surprising me at church, it was a great weekend. 

Mommy would have loved it.

MONTGOMERY COUNTY SHOOTINGS

The news has been on TV since 11:15. It's so depressing, but I haven't changed the channel. A teacher was killed last night while she waited at her daughter's school. A man who tried to help was targeted. Today more shooting. More heartache. The idea that the crimes were connected became more apparent.
Alexandra Limon's voice was telling, but she kept on reporting through the rain and the stress. I think she deserves a day off. Fortunately, the suspect was caught. This one day in May was really beginning to feel like those three weeks in October. I could almost hear Charles Moose's voice.
You never know what's going on in the minds of people; how broken, frustrated, wounded, troubled, or stressed they are. You don't know what's going on behind closed doors--strife, abuse, fear, contention, oppression, arguments, silence. The stories that are revealed after someone snaps and innocent lives are lost let us all know that something could and should have been done a long time ago. Stuff doesn't just happen. There were warnings. Temporary protective service order...permanent order...Someone DID speak up; DID seek help. Today's violence in Montgomery County was a slow simmer...

I decided to take a break from the news and check mail. The first message was Marsha Burns' daily motivation, "Small Straws in a Soft Wind": "Deliberately seek a quiet resting place in the Spirit.  Remove yourself from all chaos and confusion, and refuse to get emotionally invested in things that do not produce life and light.  You need to stay protected from circumstances and conditions that interrupt the peace of your heart, says the Lord.  
"You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You." ~Isaiah 26:3 

I definitely needed that. 

WEDNESDAY THOUGHTS: HARMONY

I love music—all kinds of music.

I’ve loved to sing ever since I was a child. 

I thank my parents for sharing their good taste in music. 

As a child, when I listened to records in our basement, I always sang along with the background vocalists. I always heard, and appreciated the harmonies.

 

I love my "20 Feet From Stardom" experiences. 

The opportunity to work with people I've admired, is such a gift. 

It's also nice when people have confidence in your ability to support them.

There's something very safe and secure about singing in the background. 

Obviously, you're not out front. 

There's no pressure.  

You may be nestled in a nice, comfortable space where you can take your shoes off, and not worry about wardrobe malfunctions, bad lighting, or wires all over the floor. 

You're there to be a help; to be encouraging; to fill empty spaces; to push another person to be their best. Sure, it's fun, but it's work, too.

 

It's a job you just can't be lax about. It's precise. You're a part of a team. No one has to know your name. 

You have one task: Sing your part and sing it correctly. 

All you have to do is remember, listen, think, smile, look alive, and do your very best to form a perfect, seamless blend with your fellow singers. 

Your part can't be weak or missing. 

It's not about you. 

You don't have to make any sudden moves. 

Just stay in your space. 

Every now and then, you'll be challenged to step forward. 

Audiences tend to like it when the background singers have skills. 

They didn't come to hear you, but they do acknowledge when you get it right; when you respect their favorite performer enough to know their music and lyrics, like you've been singing them your whole life. 

In the privacy of their homes, cars, or showers, they're background singers, too, and they know exactly where you're supposed to come in. 

You can tell, because they're singing with you from their seats.

Most background singers are quite happy where they are. 

Solos are nice, but hearing that ringing when the harmony is tight, is a wonderful thing. 

The folks I know, love harmony, and actually prefer the sound of their own voice blended with the voices of others. 

Harmony is a blessing--in music and in life. 

It's great to deliberately achieve, and maintain it.