MONDAY THOUGHTS

Be genuine. It’s too much work to be an actor, as you assess and navigate situations, spaces, and places.

Be kind. It costs nothing.

Help and volunteer with zero expectations of accolades, indebtedness, or reciprocity. 

Have pure motives for serving. It shows when you’re only availing yourself to gain access, passes, and perks, and then complain about, and bristle at the actual time commitment required, and work to be done.

Halfway is not going to cut it in spaces and places that strive for excellence.

Don’t opportunistically seek out, or collect people in an effort to feather your own nest. 

Some people can be bought. When it’s clear that you can’t be, the hopeful buyer’s countenance and attitude will sour at the thought of the company they’ve curated.

Be clear about what you did, or did not request. Sometimes, people need to you to justify or cosign what THEY want, or think is best.

The most impressive thing about you CANNOT be your list of contacts. Name dropping pales in comparison to actual, strong working and personal relationships.

The need to be seen, causes many to transform themselves into annoying busybodies, who eventually tire out from the busyness no one asked for. They must be careful, because some people WILL give them something to do just to keep them occupied, and it may not be anywhere near the glamor, or spotlight they crave.

Sometimes, it’s good to write things down. Tangents make a good premise disintegrate. Detours can be confusing and time consuming. If you have to keep reminding people where you’re going, want them to go—or are leading them—maybe you’re the one who needs convincing about the clarity and directness of the path.

You compensate people for working, providing a skill, or delivering a service, not their presence. You do not pay for friendship.

One encounter could very well spark a friendship, but time and experience cement the substance, and mutual understanding of it.

Don’t try to possess or claim people, or block them from establishing relationships with others. 

Be gracious. Don’t be too familiar. It will inspire skepticism, the swift formation of boundaries, and erase any access you may have had. 

What you have, may be opulent, fine, impressive, and expensive, but beware assuming that everyone desires, or is envious of it. Perhaps they’re noticing the obvious toll it takes from you mentally, physically, financially, and spiritually, in order to maintain and keep it. Perhaps they see little, actual enjoyment, and conclude it’s nice, but not worth it. That’s not the envy you secretly want to see in their eyes. It’s pity.

Use the words “friend” and “family” honestly, and not as a deceptive ploy.

Discern authentic hospitality, kindness, and generosity. It comes without strings.

Say “thank you”, and show appreciation when it is warranted. Say a polite “no thank you” as well, otherwise, you’ll be inundated with stuff you neither like, nor want, that reflects the tastes, wishes, and demands of others.