Sometimes, a “from now on” wells up in you that you know will serve you wonderfully in the future.
Listening is key. Listen to how people speak to you, and about you.
If they’re bold enough to consider you a pushover to your face, imagine the discussion regarding you when you’re not around!
Miss Angelou ain’t nevah lied. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. Further, when people show you how they think you ought to, and deserve to be treated, believe that, too. There’s a reason they’ve determined that YOU won’t mind, and if you’re not careful, their apathy toward you will become a habit.
Watch what people do or say to you, that they wouldn’t dare do or say to others. Sometimes we teach people that they need not be considerate, tactful, honest, just, fair, timely, consistent, kind, polite, efficient, merciful, empathetic, reasonable, or forthcoming because we’ve given them a pass; we’ve allowed untenable behavior; we don’t call them on their actions when they’re current. We just keep a file in our minds of all the times we SHOULD have said something.
It makes no sense to torment yourself AND endure a pattern of disrespect, particularly when you’ve always kept your end of the bargain.
Speak up.
Establish boundaries.
Adjust the rules.
“From now on...”, and be firm about it—and still be just as nice as ever.
“The squeaky wheel gets the oil”.
Squeaking may not be your MO.
You making noise may be shocking and even annoying, but there may be times when it is necessary— particularly if, because of your history or tendency to be passive or agreeable, no one expects a peep out of you, let alone a squeak.
Squeaking doesn’t constitute wiling out. It does demand and reveal self-respect.
You can’t be so worried about offending the repeatedly offensive.
You can’t keep quiet and bear what should have been stopped in its tracks.
At some point, someone who won’t care to handle the offensive with the grace that you would, WILL just go all the way off--publicly. Perhaps, when the reprimand is over, those who practice being offensive will wish they’d treated you better.
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The right, good, and positive things and people are mighty sweet. Give them your attention.
Give them your ear.
Stop messy people in their tracks.
You know, early on, the direction a conversation is going. Don’t let their seeds of discord to infest your thoughts, or wreck your day.
Gossip is poison.
Refuse to entertain nonsense.
Most people lament that they don’t know what to believe because they were not witnesses to a thing. Sometimes it’s who brought the information that sways people one way or another.
Once a lie is told, even when truth is revealed, irreparable damage has already been done.
How can truth be known if loyalty to personalities and lies are preferred?
Misinformation, rumors, and gossip only benefit those who spread them. It may not be consolation, but, trust—they won’t triumph for long.
The air around you should always be clear. Make it your business to keep it that way.
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Be careful not to be manipulated into getting people into places that they’ve been barred from because of their own inappropriate behavior. Who you vouch for matters. That undisciplined, opportunistic plus-one, who you insist on bringing along, can get YOU kicked out.
Who’s speaking for you? Who’s representing you without your knowledge or authorization? When you find out—and that day will come when you’re face to face with someone who’s been walking around with a weird narrative—FIX IT.
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You don’t have to even want to be in the game, but those who know what the outcome would be if you ever picked up a bat, are nonetheless, competing with you; keeping tabs on you; chasing you; hoping for some victory over you; looking for fault In you; constantly making comparisons; waiting for you to make a move; wearing themselves out trying to get the admiration or attention they think you have.
They want to know where you are; how you know who you know. Your name is always on their lips. They aim to show you just who they are. They want to be where you’ve been; prove they’re better.
You’re chilling on the sidelines, or snacking at the refreshment stand, and they can’t pay attention at bat for wondering what you’re doing, or how you acquired what you have.
It’s perfectly okay.
Get in the game.
Pick up that bat.
Why have it if you’re not going to use it and use it well?
If you’re hated every time you swing and get a hit, so what?
Keep trying, keep practicing, keep producing.
Don’t you dare shrink another day to appease the arrogant, entitled, or self-absorbed among you.
Envy and insecurity are their problems, not yours.
Maintain humility.
Focus.
Someone said that what others think of you is none of your business.
People who seem to be gunning for you, and trying to keep you anxious and off balance, will realize the futility of their obsession, and see how much time and energy they’ve wasted.
They’ll never—EVER— be you, and they obviously don’t know your God.
You don’t have to resort to scheming, manipulation or lying in order to gain opportunities, or establish relationships. God will place you precisely where they don’t think you belong, provide nurturing community, and equip you to function excellently and effortlessly for as long as He chooses.
Never mind them.
Don’t take your eyes off of Him.