Saturday, October 8, 2011

TRAIN UP A CHILD

Last week, I was privy to a rather loud, profane argument. I admit it frightened me at first and I wondered if I should dial 911. The people screaming obscenities at one another were a married couple. In the middle of the fray were their two young children. I could only imagine how anxious and fearful the children were. When the mother realized I was within earshot, she quickly changed her tone. I wanted her to know I was there. I never said a word, but she knew she was over the top. She had the capability to check herself and correct her behavior. I wonder if it was a wake-up call for her. I also wondered how many curse words and creative phrases her children now had under their tiny little belts. It's dangerous business to intervene with a parent and child these days. Many parents won't correct their children, and don't want anyone else correcting them either. You might come away with one eyebrow not singed. Confronting a parent about their own behavior may leave you in an even worse condition.
More recently, someone proudly and publicly shared a video of their toddler. Considering the content, I didn't see anything for which to be proud. While others commented on its cuteness, it did nothing more than cause me to shake my head and wonder if the person who shared it had taken leave of their senses. Sometimes we give people all the ammunition they need to question our fitness--and sanity. Sometimes we simply don't think.  Just because we CAN do, doesn't mean we should. Of course, whether a thing is adorable, funny, harmless, creative or highly inappropriate is up to the viewer or listener. I wanted to respond, but I didn't. In my state of disappointment, my response probably would have been void of all tact. We often forget how things can be misconstrued; how what seems like a minor thing can be blown out of proportion; how our own actions can be used against us. I wondered if my point would have been lost, not received, and--at worst-- more videos would have followed just to show me that, perhaps I need to lighten up. I wonder if I had said something to the angry mother if her ire would have been redirected toward me. I don't know. When it comes to kids, how they're mistreated, manipulated, used, and disregarded, I don't want to lighten up.
Kids are not toys, and parents often fail to realize how precious little time they actually have to properly train a child. Too much of that time is spent exposing children to things their impressionable minds should never hold; teaching them things that they can certainly mimic, but that have no redeemable value. Children really do learn what they live.
You can't blame the media, school, the neighborhood, or other kids when you are the reason your child either has no filter or doesn't know how to use the one they should have. Everything to which children are exposed is not age appropriate or wise. Shame on the parents who fail to recognize their own hand in the mis-education of their children. Sometimes you need look no further than your own mirror when you stupidly ask, "Now, I wonder where my child got THAT from?"
Proverbs 22:6 admonishes, "Train up a child in the way he SHOULD go; even when he is old he will not depart from it." It also explains why there are old idiots.
Sometimes you're not the one to prompt someone see the error of their ways. You may be too close. They'll reject sound advice, swim in denial, take offense, stop speaking, align themselves with fools, prefer to believe the counsel of a liar--even continue to put themselves in harm's way, before they'll say, "Wow. You're right.  I see your point".
Pastor Timothy Seay said, "You are, in essence, a product of whose hand you're in. Who's molding you? Who's shaping you? Who's guiding and directing you?...Just because someone confronts you, doesn't mean they're your enemy..."

Good home training goes a long way.

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