Monday, May 22, 2023

QUARANTINE LIFE: MONDAY THOUGHTS —COMPLIMENTS


I singled out someone whose efforts were helpful to me. Frankly, what she had done was quite satisfactory! All I had to do was build upon it. I thanked her publicly. Frankly, I couldn’t wait to meet her and tell her. I wanted her to know that her contribution could very well have sufficed. Several times, I’d done for others what she did for me. I’ve known the feeling of trying to deliver a useful product, and hoping it would be of assistance. 

Give people their flowers. Constructive feedback, I’ve learned, is always a good thing. Lord knows we’re quick to complain when a thing goes wrong. We ought to be as swift to acknowledge when it goes right.

I understand that I can compliment person A for all of the reasons, factors, and criteria that makes the praise warranted— to ME…. In MY mind… from MY heart. It doesn’t mean I don’t, or didn’t appreciate, forgot about, didn’t like, was excluding, or slighting persons B, C, or D. 

No one needs to be shushed, reminded, amended, admonished, or corrected for specifically acknowledging the good that someone has done. What might not be “all  that” to you, may be a lifesaver or game changer to someone else. 

I don’t think arrogance, pride, or a swollen head are the first responses to a simple compliment concerning a job well done, so I see no need to withhold my appreciation. 

A nod to good customer service—wherever it occurs—matters. That pat on the back today may lead to even more excellence tomorrow.

I know what I mean when I say what I say. I try to be very clear, and use all of the right words. I think when people do a good job, (and certainly, a great job), it doesn’t hurt to tell them. Anyone who can’t handle hearing another person being applauded must have missed a few valuable lessons in childhood, i.e. the importance of being gracious, knowing how to cooperate and share, and recognizing the good in others. (Thanks Mommy).

Sometimes people are trying to misunderstand, be messy, divisive, and read between lines and inject sentiments that simply aren’t there. “Hmph! Why didn’t  she say anything about so-and-so?” 

Well…Perhaps “so-and-so” wasn’t the topic of conversation, or subject of admiration, and is mature and secure enough to handle AND join in the celebration of another person. 

If you can’t bear to hear someone complimented without immediately engaging in “whataboutism”, and needing to pass out participation trophies en mass, try to examine why not. Who’s truly offended? Is everyone, whose name isn’t called, feeling kicked to the curb, invisible, and hollering like a hit dog?

If you think someone deserves an “attaboy”, or “attagirl”, go give them one—a fresh one— of your own—not one that hijacks, rides on, and crashes a compliment to another person.

Recognize good when you see it. It just might be the pick-me-up that someone needs.

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