Friday, May 19, 2023

QUARANTINE LIFE: IT’S BUSINESS


HANDLE YOUR BUSINESS 

With you, there’s no professional approach. When they call upon you, it’s always at the last minute—after they’ve exhausted other avenues—and they never have any money. Ever. 

They have a budget for everything else—all of the disposable, unnecessary bells and whistles—but what they want YOU to do, is never factored in to it. Ever.

Still, they want you to contribute to the success of a thing—specifically their own financial enrichment. They appeal to your goodwill, but that tactic is wearing thin.

There are others they’ve enlisted for the same venture, however, who they know will not fall for the okey doke. Those are the people they break their necks to adequately pay.

“You were the first person who came to mind”, they say in suspiciously flattering tones. 

Ever wonder why? What has your past behavior been? How much of the disrespect you’ve encountered is your fault?

Do you look like you’ve just got it like that? Or have you always consented to participate, knowing you’d be underpaid (or not paid at all)? Once you’d consented, did the scope of the work increase?

Have you been used? Should you pause before you start feeling honored, or appreciated for the “invitation”. 

An invitation implies that you will be attending or enjoying the festivities like everyone else, not working, purchasing a ticket, entertaining, or helping out in any way. You’re not being invited if you’re expected to provide labor. You’re being booked. If you’ve been booked, you should be paid.

The manipulative machinations, of people who want something for nothing, aren’t difficult to spot. Sometimes, you just don’t want to see. You hate to think that people are just crooks, or have difficulty respecting that what you do is WORK.

Surely you understand that the venue, those decorations, equipment, equipment operators, food, new outfits, and those celebrity participants (and all of their requirements), won’t pay for themselves. What will they have left if they pay you?

If they DO ask what your fee is, they’re offended and shocked. Why? Whatever you quote will be too much. Why? Can’t you do it for less? Can’t you help a brother or sister out? They were hoping you’d just be willing, happy, or desperate to help out. After all, you never had a fee before! What changed? Shouldn’t you just be thrilled to be in the number? 

Don’t you need the exposure? Don’t you want to rub shoulders with the big dogs?

Don’t you want an opportunity to give back? 

When did you get brand new?

“What ever happened to ministry?”, they ask (but only as it applies to what they expect YOU to do). 

How dare you need money to live! 

How dare you work and expect to be paid in full, and on time— like they do! 

Who do you think you are? I mean, you’re something, but you’re not all that!

So…why did they call?  Who told them to call? Who’s speaking for you, volunteering and underselling your services?

This is when you should ponder exactly who called whom. You were minding your business, and certainly weren’t contemplating how to participate in the reinstitution of slavery. Why are you haggling with anyone who doesn’t appreciate your worth?

When people treat your livelihood as if it’s their hobby, WAKE UP. Every time you say “Yes” to an empty opportunity, you miss out on a lucrative one.

Wake up. When they call upon others who do the same thing you do, suddenly they don their business hats. They get serious. They find a budget. The money magically materializes. They have to pay—sign an agreement, even—if they want the product or service. They will handsomely, and gladly pay THEM. Why not you?

Face it. You’ve been so trusting, handshakey, and loosy goosy about YOUR business, that they don’t think twice about nickel-and-dime-ing YOU. You’re so nice. Maybe too nice.

They’ll expect excellence when you show up. They’ll even brag that they secured your product or services as if they paid top dollar. They’ll require you to imitate or replicate what they couldn’t afford, while pocketing what they didn’t have to disburse for travel, accommodations, and meals. 

They’ll demand that you add value, and then insult you with non-negotiable tender (food, flowers, certificates, party favors, t-shirts, etc.), as if it’s in any way equivalent to your labor. 

This isn’t their first rodeo. They know the going rates for everything. They know full well the cost of what they’re asking YOU to do. They’ve paid it before to other people. Somehow, when they call on you, they get amnesia. The poor-mouthing commences. 

Your past consent has established a pattern. They know they can get a whole lot from you for little, or nothing. You’ve consistently played along. Now you’re considered “humble” and “dependable”. What you rarely are, and must be, once and for all, is “paid”.

Aren’t you tired of paying to play? You have a sinking feeling in your gut every time you walk away empty-handed, stiffed, or are left waiting indefinitely for what’s due you. You know full well they wouldn’t treat THEM the way they’ve treated you. They’d be put on blast at least, and sued at most. Question is, what are you accepting that others would never abide? Why do you continue to lowball yourself, or settle for less?

Keep on falling for the con; keep on allowing people to use you, and you’ll continue to devalue yourself. 

Just like other working people, you should be able to pay your bills in full, and on time. As a result of your work, your pockets and purses and accounts should fill at some point, too— not with tokens, or reluctantly given honorariums, but with what your time and effort is actually worth. You, however, have to know and establish what that is.

People do what you allow. You teach people how to treat you. 

It’s okay to be the help or the volunteer, every now and then. Sowing is a wonderful thing, but if others can be the employee, so can you. If they can find the money to pay THEM, they can pay you.

Are you’re too eager and needy sometimes? 

Are you too afraid to say, “No”? 

Are you too apprehensive to ask for what you know you deserve? 

Do you even know what your time and work is worth? Have you studied or researched the business of your business?

Are you worried they won’t call upon you anymore? 

If ANY of the above is true, they know it. That’s why they call on you. Whether the budget is low OR high, you’re going to be shortchanged. Your needs will not be a priority. Others will be paid before you see a dime. They’ll have the benefit of your work AND make a profit.

Speak up. Ask questions. Your time and talent is worth something. Perhaps you’ve never been encouraged to handle your business before, because you’ve never viewed it as such. Change that TODAY. What will you lose if people stop calling who only thought about you when they wanted something for nothing?

Be better to yourself.

Your talent, and all that was invested to make it what is today, matters.

Know your business.

Respect your business.

Handle your business. 

You best believe that everybody else is unapologetically handling theirs.



COMPETENCE MATTERS 

People can love or like you, but have no interest in, nor appreciation for what you do. Tastes vary and are subjective. Consider that what you’re asking others to support or endorse, by their presence or resources, is simply not their cup of tea. 

Consider, too, that, no matter who put you on, or gave you the job, it may not because you’re deserving or good. You have to know whether you got the job because you’re actually deserving and qualified, or if you’re feeding someone’s narrative, satisfying a prejudice, or because no one else wanted it, or was available. 

Sometimes there’s a payoff for installing inappropriate people in positions who are glaringly void of necessary skills. It’s the kind of backward move that reduces an organization to joke status, and diminishes its history and credibility.

Never lie about your own strengths. Know your limitations. Wisdom, honesty, and maturity dictate when to step aside.

The face of a thing matters. Empowering mediocrity is dangerous. Designating authority to mediocrity invites delusion and arrogance. Lying about the quality of a thing doesn’t make it acceptable. It inspires people to claim competence where none exists, and occupy spaces and places they can be, but definitely don’t belong. 

Credibly is lost when incompetence is applauded. There’s a payoff for embracing, polishing, and promoting ignorance and incompetence.

When you go along to get along, you get what you bargained for; you open a thing up to ridicule, criticism, and judgment. 

It’s hard to take a thing seriously when mediocrity reigns. It questions the interest and sobriety of decision makers. Mediocrity can’t be packaged or dressed up enough to overshadow competence.

The consolation is that, no matter how mediocrity and incompetence are emboldened and promoted, people will always pursue and find what is genuinely good. Greatness and competence will not go to waste, or be forgotten, no matter how mediocrity appears to dominate. 

It’s true. You get what you pay for. Everyone loves a bargain, but even a supposed bargain can be problematic.

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