Monday, April 7, 2014

MONDAY THOUGHTS: OTHER MESSAGES

So...I took a little time to explore/clean out the messages section of my Facebook page. They do tend to pile up! 
Lots of invitations, recommendations, offers, announcements (and craziness) are there.

I admit, I don't check them every day. 
Most times, if something is pressing, I'll get a "check your inbox" reminder on the page--or a phone call

The inbox, as you all know, includes unread, archived, and spam messages. As with e-mail, sometimes the host will take it upon itself to determine what's spam, so it's good to check it every now and then, so that you don't miss something important from an actual friend. 

Yesterday, however, was the FIRST time, since I joined Facebook back in 2009 (I think), that I explored the messages section labeled "OTHER". 
I did my best to apologetically respond to the very kind words of people who were not Facebook friends, but were allowed to message me about one thing or another, because of my settings.
And then, there were those, who think Facebook is Cavemanbook:"You! I saw your picture! I want you! Talk to me, now! Accept my friend request, now!"

Whew!...Very scary...lol.

The remainder were interesting, too. 
Some users have either established Rules for Use, or somehow believe that everyone uses Facebook the same way that they do.
 
And then, there were the offended message senders. 
After I did not reply in a timely fashion to the first messages they sent, one writer got a little snippy in their subsequent attempts to reach me: 
"Um. Excuse me. HELLO? Too busy to reply?"
"I'm trying to get you some exposure. 
This is a great opportunity. 
You need to get back to me".
"I guess you don't talk to little people".
"So you're just not going to answer?".
"I see you on here every day posting stuff, so I know you see this. Could you at least give me a yes or no? I need to know something by Friday."

Well, whatever the pressing thing was took place on a Friday in 2011. I guess I missed something, huh?

I'll try to do better about reading messages, especially since some actually made my day (Thank you, Rina Parikh, Conrad Miller, Lidia Estrada Martinez, and Bee Jay), but I still don't respond to snippiness. (Is that a word?) 
Why immediately go negative? 
It is possible that users aren't being rude or dismissive. They simply don't get or see messages. 
Does anyone think there's anything about a bad attitude, or aggressive manner that will inspire someone to open up; respond, or be happy to see their face--even online?

Silence, whether it is deliberate or not, is a response, however it is one that some people don't exactly appreciate. I've learned that in my old age. Certainly, no one wants to be ignored, but how one approaches others will definitely impact the response one gets. It's even more important to curb one's attitude when engaging strangers. 
Facebook has facilitated the delusion that friendships exist where they don't. It has also given users the idea that others are obligated to connect and converse.

When people want to engage, and don't get the immediate response they're seeking, I imagine it can be frustrating, but one should never venture so far as to be demanding or pushy. 
Copping an attitude just seems a bit childish, and sends up red flags. Becoming defensive, or being offended demonstrates quite a lot of nerve, especially when one is attempting to engage a stranger.

Frankly, it seems that some people go about looking for confrontations, altercations and arguments--or reasons to support their unreasonable or unfounded expectations and evaluations of others. 
A bad attitude, before an explanation is heard, 
(I didn't see it; 
I didn't get it; 
I didn't know that was there; 
My internet is down; 
I was in the hospital:
My account was hacked;
I've been extremely busy; 
I'm on a social networking break; 
I accidentally deleted it; 
The dog ate my computer), 
will greatly contribute to the lack of access-- or continued silence.


#socialmedia
#facebook
#attitudeiseverything
#benice

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