SUBSTITUTE TEACHER TALES: WALKING IDIOPHONES

Long ago, an unknown author wrote: "Sunshine and rainbows, and ribbons for hair bows--
that's what little girls are made of..."

I don't think he or she had any idea what the future held. 

Hair ornamentation isn't new, but there may be an argument, in the interest of education, for "Less is more", at least when it comes to the "hair bows". 

I've noticed in the last month or so, that a head full of accessories is more distracting to a student than a visitor walking into the room. 

Little girls with a head full of barrettes will spend half of the day twirling them, unsnapping and snapping them, chewing on them, or aggressively retrieving them from other people--or the floor.

I submit that if you incorporate every last barrette, bow, and bead in the economy-sized package, while creating your child's hairstyle, cute/creative though it may be, your child--and any kid near her--will hear, and be in danger of learning next to nothing in school for the duration of the hairdo.

Your child, the walking idiophone, will delight in hearing the rattling, clicking, and clacking that compete with other sounds in the classroom...like...well...for example...the teacher's voice...giving directions...after which your child will yell out, "Umm. What are we s'posed to do?". 

Her classmates, on the other hand, will be positively mesmerized by all of the colors and shapes, and unable to keep their little hands to themselves...about which your child will yell out, "Stop touching me! "E'scuse me. Can you tell her to stop touching me?" or "Can you tell her to give me back my barrette(s)?"  (With so many, weighing down tiny little heads, it's amazing that one barrette would even be missed.)

Perhaps the issue can be turned into a teachable moment for instructors OTHER than, let's say, the Music specialist ( who may not have had enough money in the budget to purchase percussion instruments, and might actually welcome the noisy hair rhythms.

Here's an idea:
"Little__________has 248 barrettes in her hair that threaten to poke her eye out, create a choking hazard, or launch a colorful projectile every time she turns her head. 

Twenty-seven of them are blue. 

Sixteen of them are orange. Forty-one are pink. 

Five are white. 

Nine are red.

The rest are green. 

How many green barrettes are in Little __________'s hair?

Show your work".